


The Past Remembered

by LittleSweetCheeks



Series: If I'd Known... I never... [1]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Depression, Future Fic, Gen, Loneliness, Seperation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-02
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-06-01 09:28:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15140123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleSweetCheeks/pseuds/LittleSweetCheeks
Summary: He was alone and it was by his own doing.





	The Past Remembered

_If I’d known then what I know now._ He thought to himself, staring out the window at the sunlight dancing through the trees in the courtyard. _If I’d known… I never would have stayed gone when I had a choice._

He sighed, wondering how he hadn’t seen this end coming. He’d been a profiler for crying out loud! A man who spent his career anticipating outcomes. And yet…

“Mister Hotchner?” A soft voice spoke from behind him.

Aaron looked up from his chair at the petite, blonde nurse, she reminded him of JJ when she’d first joined the team. The sudden memory brought tears to his eyes and he blinked quickly to clear them before they fell.

Nancy gave him a soft smile, she’d heard about him from the other staff when she’d started working at the nursing home. They said he was quiet, withdrawn, but sweet enough. “I saw you over here watching out the window. I’m headed on my lunch if you would like to come sit out in the garden?”

It took him a minute to find his voice and when he did, it was a simple question. “Are you sure?”

She nodded. “It’s still a bit cool out, but nothing a good blanket won’t take care of.”

“Okay.” He sat back as she disengaged the brakes and pushed his chair, collecting a blanket and her lunch kit before pushing him into the empty garden.

Settled on a bench, Nancy turned to him. “So, Mister Hotchner, what had you thinking so hard?”

Aaron stared at a flower trying to bloom. “I was thinking of regrets.”

She tipped her head to the side. “Is there something you regret?” He didn’t answer right away, and she decided he wasn’t going to. “I’m sorry, Mister Hotchner, I didn’t mean to press.”

His eyes rose and stared into her. He hadn’t spoken about it in years, not since he’d arrived at the home. “No, I’m sorry. I guess I’m not really good at opening up.”

“Out of practice, maybe?”

That made him chuckle, it felt weird, foreign. “I guess you could say I never was really good at opening up.”

“There’s always time for a first time.”

Aaron considered that a moment, maybe it would help to share his thoughts. “Somehow I never imagined I would end up so…alone.” He drew in a deep breath. “A long time ago I worked on a team, they were my family I guess, but… Life got in the way, things happened and…” He wasn’t sure how to go on. “When I had the chance to go back to them, I decided not to.”

“Can I ask why? If they were your family, why didn’t you return?”

“I can’t really remember anymore.” A soft hand landing on his startled him. “Before you came over, I was thinking that if I had realized then that I would end up all alone like this, maybe I would have chosen differently.”

She squeezed his hand. “It’s never too late to reach out.”

Aaron chewed his lip. “Maybe one day… Not today though.”

Nancy nodded. “Okay. Just say the word and I’ll do what I can.”

Aaron gave her a weak smile. “Thank you.”


End file.
